Bullshit schools

The Mash continues to hit the spot:


INDEPENDENT faith schools have been warned that differing types of voodoo must be taught with the same accuracy as their own brand of mojambo.

Ofsted inspectors found many teachers in faith schools used air-quotes when discussing rival horseshit and habitually ended lessons by making oral sex gestures by moving their hand while poking their tongue against the inside of their cheek.

Schools inspector, Tom Logan, said: “Unfortunately more than 80% of Britain’s Catholic schools now display a poster of Maureen Lipman sporting a crudely-drawn pair of satanic horns.

“Meanwhile, Muslim schools have altered their computer spellcheckers so that whenever a child writes ‘Christian’ or ‘Buddhist’ a little box appears saying ‘it looks like you’re trying to spell ‘bastard infidel’.”

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